I came across someone today after a complicated stream of consciousness. Essentially, I was thinking about writing and thinking about how the issue with writing for me is the fear of coming off like a pompous ass. A specific pompous ass. This thought prompted me to google said pompous ass; unfortunately, I could only remember the name of his shitty entry in an internet film contest from almost ten years ago. Maybe ten..not sure. Regardless, with some creative googling I found the ass, who I'll call Baldy Spanks (because I lack wit, but NOT immaturity). Turns out Baldy Spanks had a plethora of blogs attributed to him, which didn't surprise me the bit. Then I thought "Surely a megalomaniac such as Baldy Spanks has a Twitter account." You see, if goddamn Oprah has an account, I'm pretty sure everyone and their mom does. And if my mom gets one, I'm leaving. No offense to my mom, but I have principles to stand by. (These don't require any sort of protest on my part, so they don't fall under the "needs passion" guidelines.)
I find Baldy Spanks on Twitter--no surprise there-- and browse over his posts. I find the last few posts going on about how he's gonna do some "crazy ranting". OMG! Epic! Crazy ranting! LOOKOUT! The build-up was too much...I HAD to click on the link of said crazy ranting. I skimmed the intro post to see it was described as more *gasp* ranting! And it promised to be oh-so random. Oh, and it was "rated" NC-17. Now to me, NC-17 holds the promise that I'm going to get to see a lot of t & a and perhaps a couple of dicks sans penetration. Was that over the line? Shoot. let me do that again... Now to me, NC-17 holds the promise that I'm going to get to see a lot of toast & apricots and perhaps a couple of [censored] sans [censored]. I'm not entirely sure how this would happen on an audio podcast, but I remained ready to be wowed. Show me your toast!
I'm not entirely sure if I need to state that listening to Baldy Spanks drained a little bit of my soul out with it, but it did. And since when did throwing out the word "fuck" cause something to be NC-17 anyway, cause that's all it was. I listened to him bemoan modern culture and trash new media and proclaim that certain folks be arrested for essentially insulting his pseudo-indie wanna-be edgy tastes in media. It was kinda like listening to someone desperately trying to be the Everyman's Quentin Tarantino and failing miserably. Sad thing was, it wasn't that his ideals were so out there, but his delivery was so goddamn dramatic in a "Aaah! Fuck the world! I'm the hip! You suck! Eat it!" sort of way, followed up with a self-promotional type "Look at me! I'm the hip! I told everyone they suck and they can eat it! I'm raw! And edgy!" manner.
I decided to check out what Baldy Spanks recommended in terms as cutting edge stuff, and it was...well...there are no words really...but I saw a cartoonish wang, so it must be cutting edge right? (/sarcasm)
In other words...Baldy Spanks has not really changed much in the past whatever years. I find that sort of consistency rather comforting, in an odd sort of way.

I will leave you with this parting thought..one uttered perhaps every time Baldy Spanks was trying to convey his true emotion: "It's like....fuuuck."

(I know, I am indeedy a pompous ass. Ah well.)