I’ve had an incredible funk of a few weeks. After spending two days in the cold on set of The Grassman, I returned home feeling a little “off”. At first I thought ‘Damn, I’m awfully sore for not really doing anything too strenuous.” Then I felt like my eyeballs were roasting, which is always a sure sign of a fever. I soon realized that I wasn’t dealing with over-worked muscles, but lovely body aches, soon followed by nausea and headaches. Ah yes, “flu-like” symptoms. I spent several days out of work, felt better, relapsed, and finally am feeling 100% – minus the HORRIBLE FREAKING INSOMNIA I’ve had this whole time. Aren’t you supposed to be able to sleep all day with the flu? Not I. So now I’m trying to feel well enough to do actual active things instead of feeling like a zombie. What is it about getting sick that, while your body has eradicated the virus or whatever, regaining momentum takes several days longer? To top it off, I hate sitting still too long, so all this resting and being drained is making me completely stir crazy.
The plus side? I managed to play a few more minutes of F.E.A.R 2 without cowering, thereby increasing my total play time to about an hour. Victory is mine!
Back when Flags of Our Fathers and Letters From Iwo Jima came out, I was so looking forward to seeing these movies. I enjoy some Clint Eastwood direction first of all, and the concept between two almost complimentary films seemed very novel.
I have still not seen either film despite renting and DVR’ing both of them. Lack of motivation and getting easily distracted are to blame.
This image marks the first one I’ve done from start to finish completely digital. As you can see, my Photoshop skills are top notch. Hell, I don’t know why I didn’t consider a career in graphic arts. I would pwn it all with my skills. LEET!
There *was* a monkey in the original photo, but he got airbrushed out, due to his jackassery behavior of sitting on his ass and eating a granola bar while the soldiers did all the work.
Which reminds me of hiking in the mountains with my family as a child. After a good 4 hour hike, there would always be a granola bar or fruit snacks at the end of the trail. Trails that weren’t loops, so there was another 4 hours to get back down. I always looked forward to those snacks. At one point, one of my brothers mentioned that hiking wasn’t about granola bars and fruit snacks. Bullshit. Any Nature Valley commercial disproves that malarkey.
And look – there’s a whole channel devoted to people who like their granola bars after doing stuff. In your face, whichever brother that was!
As a child, I had an odd fear of kites. Don’t get me wrong; I liked kites. I loved kite-flying. But I was afraid to actually hold onto the kite. My parents used to take us out to a local park, which also happened to be perfect for sled-riding, to fly kites when the weather was perfect. Once it got up in the air, I was convinced that it would some how be able to drag me off the ground and fly me away. To counter this, I would rationalize in my head that by lying flat on the ground, the kite would be unable to take me away. Unfortunately, I don’t recall my parents being too understanding of this phobia. How does one, as a young child, articulate “Look guys, I’m scared shitless of this kite. Just allow me this one crazy indulgence so I can fly the kite in peace.”? I just figured this was the start of my craziness and thought nothing more of it. I laugh about it now. So cute how crazy I was.
Then I see this video today:
Now I’m thinking maybe I wasn’t so crazy after all.
(By the way…at the 1:12 mark – could that guy’s voice POSSIBLY get any higher?)
If you’re a non-craft-type person like myself, I highly recommend a look at the “before & after” section on Design*Sponge to really let it sink in that you have no skills to do awesome craft projects. Seriously though, there’s some really amazing, non-genital-related projects featured on the site. The latest is all win for me, plus it doesn’t look too far out of the realm of what I’m capable of doing..except I neither own nor really know what a frisket is. Who doesn’t want an octopus end table, really? It reminds me of those old sea illustrations with sea monsters and the like. The artist posted a simple step-by-step here. I feel inspired to do something like this, but as I mentioned before, my craft skills are undeveloped. (It’s the phrase “craft” – reminds me too much of old ladies and Martha Stewart. Ew!) Maybe I’ll get over the aversion if I call it “woodworking”.
Just in case you weren’t aware that there are some really…odd..people out there, or that the internet is a great way to find them, I present you with this wonderful etsy profile.
I feel like a dick (no sidejoke there intended) cause there’s this elaborate blurb about sexual abuse and her *feelings*, but the celebrating of the vagina..it’s just so…fem movement circa 1990s.
And never have I seen so many items designed around the female genitalia that wasn’t in that shady shop off the highway with the equally shady men inside that I don’t even like to accidentally brush shoulders with cause I just know they’re gonna be whacking later and frankly, that’s too much info for me to handle. Plus, they never seem to be looking at the good stuff.
I’m wondering if the fam would be too terribly upset if this baby ended up on the couch:
And for Christmas, I want my own vulva portrait. I will hang it above the tv. Or not..
Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad that this person is happy with her body. I just don’t buy into the whole celebration of the vag thing. It’s a body part. That’s all. Ooh. Magical. (I know, I’m no fun.)
Do guys get all celebratory about their manly bits? Like “I used to feel dirty about my penis. Now I love it. And all the penises I meet.”? Cause so far the only thing I’ve seen on etsy that dealt with manly bits were labeled as “NAUGHTY!!!” Yes folks, having a male sex organ on a piece of paper (ie, “penis stationary”) is “NAUGHTY”.
I just set myself for all the pervs to find me now with all that vag and peni talk. Shit.
Saw this on Boing Boing earlier today. Apparently it’s a Finnish duo of two rapping kids. They were 4, but since the band was formed in 2004, I’m gonna assume they are 8 now unless this is a Menudo-type outfit and they rotate out kids after so many years. But that’s just weird.
Of course it being Finnish, I haven’t the slightest idea what the song is about, but damn, is it catchy. And the cartoon-dancing just makes me squeal with glee. I need to get my youngest to learn these moves. And maybe Finnish.
One of my latest finds on the interwebs works as both a sort-of creative outlet and a time-waster/ distraction for me: Odosketch. It’s not really so much of a time waster, except my creative skills with a regular ol’ mouse are limited to say the least, so I’m making lots of crap art. However, lots of other people are REALLY freaking good at this. I think they are somehow cheating. Or, perhaps I really can’t do “digital” art. Or they are cheating.
Exhibit A: One of mine.
Exhibit B: Definitely NOT one of mine.
Exhibit C: Mine.
Exhibit D: Again, not mine. Sigh.
In fact, you could almost classify the sketches in two categories: The REALLY good ones, and Mine.
It may have something to do with the fact that I know nothing of shading…or…drawing for that matter. But I hold on to the dream. Oh yes…
There are a few terms that, for one reason or another, just make me twitch. “New media” is one, cause, really, is it all still “new” now? That’s a relative term. The other is “social media” considering, as many have said, the very nature is anti-social. I’ll admit it, I LOVE me some twitter and Facebook, although Twitter was way more fun pre-Oprah. I think the Oprah frenzy died down, but I’m still tired of seeing mobile phone companies trying to be hip by mentioning Twitter in their ads. “Well..shit..I was going to go with Sprint, but they haven’t mentioned Twitter yet in their ads so clearly they hate technology.” We get it. You know that we know. A-MA-ZING.
My major “issue” with the whole social media wave is the amount of twats emerging (and that may or may not be a whole pun/spin off of Twitter..I haven’t decided yet) proclaiming themselves to be “experts” on the matter.
Hmm…”expert”, you say? Well…let’s dissect this one a bit, shall we? Let’s think about other experts. Like, I dunno, an expert in marine forensics perhaps.
“I’m an expert in marine forensics. I have a college degree and many years of hands-on experience. I am recognized by other people in my field as being knowledgeable and reliable on the subject.”
“I’m a social media expert. I blog. I use Twitter. And Facebook. And sometimes I blog about blogging. Or I blog about how you should be blogging and I link to that blog post in my Twitter account. And I share links to other blogs and YouTube videos in Twitter and Facebook. And sometimes I blog about how you should use Twitter, which of course I link to in my Twitter account. So you see…expert. Pay me money.”
I guess the word “expert” is becoming relative as well? Social media “experts” like to proclaim themselves to be experts. If that’s acceptable, I henceforth declare myself to be an expert in awesome. Because I said. One day I shall have conferences on how you too can be awesome. It’ll be epic. Beowulf-style.
These experts also like to throw in phrases like “personal branding”, and remind us gently via 20 blog posts and twice as many Twitter updates that those nudie picks we’ve posted of last Saturday night can easily be accessed via potential and current employers. I like to call those “Epiphanies of the Obvious, aka, No Shit Sherlock”. I know not to put up dickvids (aside from that being a physically impossibility…the female version doesn’t sound nearly funny enough), yet that doesn’t make me an expert? Or does it? The non-dickviding expert?
It’s just a ridiculous amount of clutter on the internet, and we don’t need any more clutter. To those self-proclaimed social media experts: If all you are doing is pontificating your expertise on Twitter, please knock it the hell off and get an actual job. Thanks.