Or, “A Movie of People Making Stupid Choices”

Three people get stuck in an ATM by one initially unarmed man in a big coat. The stalker may or may not be the same person responsible for killing all those people in Urban Legends. They do seem to shop at the same coat store. “Burlington’s for Psychos.”

But hey, what is a stalker/slasher type movie without people making dumb choices? Like, I don’t know, stopping at an ATM in the middle of the night. Or not posse-ing up and kicking the stranger’s ass.

As for our killer-stalker-heavily bundled guy, he’s far too resourceful. Look, I appreciate a resourceful bad guy, but this guy was too coincidentally resourceful. Kinda like the killer in The Collector.

Actually, I suppose other than the fact that the movie is full of people making dumb decisions and that it lacks any real satisfying conclusion, and that it really failed to provide any suspense…no, nevermind. It was bad.

Every now and then, I end up watching a movie that messes with my head, but not because of clever plot twists and surprise endings. No, these movies mess with my head because about over halfway into the film, I realize I have no fucking idea what is going on. Whoever wrote the synopsis of said film tends to embellish certain themes and plots in the film. This was the case with “The Eclipse”. I don’t have too many issues with this film, as it was beautifully shot and had a solid cast. But, while it’s listed as a horror film, it plays more like a standard drama. In fact, I found myself forgetting that there were horror elements lurking about that when they did occur, I ended up ripping out the headphones and jerking away the iPod in genuine terror. (By the way – Netflix app = greatest thing ever.) The horror moments were tossed in such innocuous moments of tranquility that I truly did not see them coming. You know how most horror movies like to employ the use of music to warn us that danger is lurking nearby? Yeah, forget about that device.

Just so you can fully understand the experience, imagine you’re relaxing and listening to a piece of soft, soothing music. You’re very very peaceful and mellow, not a care in the world and OMG WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??

See? Jarring, isn’t? Eventually by the second time of falling for this, I remained on edge the rest of the film. That is to say, the rest of the film that barely skimmed the horror events. By the time the screen faded, I found myself stunned, wondering what the hell had just happened. Either the Irish are more subtle about their suspicions of ghostly presences than I am used to, or Synopsis Writer was having a laugh. Well done, on all parties involved.